hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
