South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
