my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
NoShamevember. You game?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
