found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
you win again, gameday.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Randomize