We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
love makes seman taste better
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
