There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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