This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
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