did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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