This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
