This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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