He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
