It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
