All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
