I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
