So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
