he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
