i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
God I need to hump something, right now.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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