But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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