Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
