So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
