Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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