She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Randomize
