OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
