So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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