no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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