Can i not drive my cunt home
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
