Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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