i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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