somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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