My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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