There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
