I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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