The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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