I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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