Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
they need to just BURY HIM!
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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