How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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