We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
