Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
