If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
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