we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
