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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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