I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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