Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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