Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Randomize
