Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Randomize
