Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
