So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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