Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
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