You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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