first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize
