So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
