alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I just blew my weed a kiss
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
