Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
